Since MAB and I had our exchange, I have to say that most of what is on my mind has nothing to do with the past. This surprises me beyond expectation. I look forward to so many things - incoming storm fronts, Halloween, Friday Night Raids, meals (no shocker). Whenever I think of friends tho, it has been for as long as I can remember, how things were and never about how things will be. I have been fixated on how the past molds the future as if it were a concrete slab.
I have considerable difficulty moving beyond the fact that some people move on for good. Maybe they do. I got a note in my Facebook message box today...it has been in my mind since - and sitting here in my rainy day spot - since its really coming down - I have to say the external validation has arrived. Even though most of us have screwed up in the past, I am pretty sure that most people who read this consider themselves good friends. The kind of friends who listen and support even when they dont agree.
Maybe some people are just so afraid of the uncertainty of the future they prefer the security of analyzing the past. Making sure that whatever comes along, they are not destined to repeat the mistakes of days gone by. Theres value in that. I guess I just got paralyzed by it...I still am. At least now I can try to fix that issue.
Its almost time to write again. Dare to think about what that experience will be like. Heres to some more meterological motivation and more rain.
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